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论坛地址:http://www.vemp.tw/bbs/thread-484821-1-1.html


I'm a dad, clinically depressed, slightly drunk, having dealt with cunts all day, and I'm here to confirm your biases. This whole sub gets it.I haven't been a member of Reddit for like 2 years now. And I don't know why I came to this sub. Reading these posts about how happy you all are makes me even more depressed.

我是一位父亲,被临床诊断患有抑郁症,现在稍微有些喝醉了。我整日都和娘们打交道,我来这里发言是为了证实你们所怀有的那些偏见都是真实的。我想整个板块的人都会理解我的痛楚。我已经两年多没逛Reddit了。我也不知道自己为?#20301;?#26469;到这个板块。而读到那些你们多么快乐自在的帖子也让我感觉愈加的沮丧。



I'm 47 and my son is 4. I was a total cf type just like you all until 41, was clear about not wanting kids. I had broken off an engagement and several relationships because in the end, the woman ALWAYS wanted a fucking kid. So I got finally got married to someone who claimed not to want one, then 4 years into my marriage she changed and just had to have one to "feel complete", and that went on for a year or two. I changed my mind for about 2-3 months, thinking maybe a kid isn't so bad and, you know, that's all it takes. You can change your mind one way, but once the sperm and egg get to work, you can't change it back.

我今年47岁,我的儿子则?#31456;?岁。当我41岁时,我还和你们一样,是一个立志这辈子绝对不会要小孩的人。我为此解除过一?#20301;?#32422;和好几段关系,因为当事情发展到最后时,女人?#20146;?#26159;会想着生个孩子,因为这才会让她们的生活变得“完整”。后来,我总算和一个声称自己不想要孩子的女人结婚了,然后4年过去后,她变了,她想要一个孩子,以感受“完整的人生”,时间又过去了一两年。忽然在某一个段时间里我觉得生一个孩子并不是什么糟糕的事情,接下来的事情你们都懂得。你可以重新改变自己的思想,然而当精子和卵子结?#40092;保?#20320;就没法将它们再次分离了。

So here I am. My wife makes a lot more than I did, so I'm the stay at home parent. She also can't drive, so I'm also on point for anything that requires driving.

于是我成了今天这副摸样。我老婆挣的钱比我多很多,因此我只能当一个家庭主夫。我的老婆不会开车,所以任何需要开车的事情都得我来做。



Part of the issue too is that my wife is Chinese, which means that with the advent of a kid, the in-laws get involved and if you're not familiar with Chinese culture then you cannot possibly imagine the bullshit. That would be a post all by itself. I had to fight so hard, for over a year to get them off my shit all the time and out of my fucking house.

导致局面发展到今天的一部分原因在于我的妻子是个华人,这就意味着当你们的孩子出世时,她的娘家也会参与到你们的家庭之中,如果你熟悉中国文化的话,就知道我没有在扯蛋。这个话题得重开一贴才能讲的完,我就不一一道来了。在长达一年的时间里,我一直在抗争,好让他们别管我的闲事,并远离我的房子。

Know the fun part? Only since having the kid, did I realize that my wifes parents have a huge, huge influence on her. And then I realized that she only started making noise about wanting a child after her parents moved into our area in 2013-2014...I try not to think about that too much. It doesn't lead anywhere good.

你们知道最有趣的部分是什么吗?直到我们生下了孩子,我才意识到我妻子的父母对她有着多么巨大的影响。这之后我才意识到,她的父母就是在2013-2014年搬到我们这个社区的,而她正是从那时候开始嚷着想要一个孩子。我尽量试着不去想这些事情,因为这么做并不会带来任何正面的效果。

Most people think I'm a great dad. That I'm a lot more active with my child than most fathers. A number of people have suggested I work with kids (but others suspect I'm a Child Molester because you know, male adult in America who gets along with kids). My son, who I love and regards me as his closest living partner.I've never yelled at him and have never needed to... I just explain why something needs to be done and he does what I ask. We get along great. This room that I'm in is filled with little homemade toys... a train, a little house, that I've cut for him out of cardboard boxes. I write comic strips for him where he is the protagonist.

大部分人都觉得我是一位优秀的父亲。他们认为我对孩子的态度比大多数父亲都更加积极。很多人都建议我去从事和孩子们相关的工作。(但是其他人则怀疑我是一个儿童性骚扰者,原因你们都懂的,一个和孩子们相处很好的成年美国男子就是会被人们用这样的有色眼镜所?#21019;#?#25105;深爱着自己的孩子,而他也视我为他最亲密的生活伴侣。我出来没有吼过他,因为完全没有必要...我只需要向他解释为什么要这么做,他便会照着我的吩咐去做。我们相处得很好。我现在身处的房间里摆满着各种自制的小玩具... 一辆火车,一座小房子,这些都是我用纸板箱给他做的。我还为他花了一本连环画,而他则是画中的主人公。

But anything else, it's just impossible to complete a task. I start working out, I get interrupted by someone. Drawing, reading, writing... fuck. I seriously tried to take a shit today and by the time I was finished, both he and my wife were in the bathroom with me. I play video games primarily because I don't need to give a video game my full attention. I am constantly on call.

但是除此之外,我生活中任何的一切都像是一项不可能完成的任务。我重新开始锻炼身体,然而总会有人冒出来打断我。绘画,阅读,写作更是想都不用想..操。我今天想自己一个人安静地拉泡屎,但是当我上完事时,我儿子和妻子都已经在卫生间陪伴着我了。我玩游戏最主要的理由就是我不需要全情?#24230;?#21040;游?#20998;?#20013;,这样一来我就能随时待命,听后他们的差遣。

I hate nearly everyone I deal with. I used to just avoid people I didn't like. But now, since I need to take my son to certain functions and deal with extended family, I'm constantly having to interact with people who I want to punch in the mouth. In fact I've just had a horrible time with 3 such people and that's why I'm typing this, to calm myself down so that I can go to sleep.

我讨厌几乎所有和我打交道的人们。在过去我总是可以避开自己不?#19981;?#30340;人们。然而现在,为了带自己的儿子参加一些活动,我必须和很多家庭的人们打交道,我被迫和那些自己想抽他们一耳光的人们交谈。事实上,我刚刚和三个这样的人们度过了一段可怕的时光。这就是驱使我来这里写下这篇文章的原因,以便让自己能够冷静下来,好去睡个?#21442;?#35273;。

And you're constantly being judged, as a dad. You have no idea how shit it is and how so many other parents are haters and assholes. If you're a dad who works and consequently can't interact much with your kids, people accuse you of not giving a fuck. If you interact with your kid too much, you're a creeper. Fuck this society and the way it treats dads. FUCK FUCK FUCK.

作为一位父亲,我总是被人们评头论足。你们不知道这种感觉有多么的糟糕。你们不知道竟有如此多的父母都是仇恨者,混蛋。如果你是一位在外工作的父亲的话,你便不能和你的孩子做太多的互动,人们会指责你不关心自己的孩子。而当你和自己的孩子互动太多时,你就成为了人们眼中那个猥琐的男人。这个社会就是如此?#21019;?#29238;亲们的,操操操。



The biggest thing keeping me from suicide is my son. I can't abandon my son like that. It would scar him and he still needs me at least for now. It's important to note that I don't blame him for anything that I'm feeling or going through. It's not his fault.

阻止我实施自杀的最大的因素就是我的儿子。我不能就这么抛弃他。因为这将会给他的心中留下伤疤,至少现在的他还十分地需要我。最重要的是,我不想将自己所遭受的一切苦难归咎于他,这并不是他的错。

Edit:I don't know if I'll be back or not. Because some of you will inevitably call me an asshole and I can't really dispute that. I am one. On top of that there's nothing you can tell me about my situation, probably, that I don't already know. I've had years to ponder my situation and it the mental conclusion is always the same: An indeterminate amount of time being completely out of place and severely depressed, followed by my next career which is being coyote food.

编辑:我不知道自己还会不会回来看这个帖子。因为你们中的一些人肯定会说我是个混球,我不能否认这一点。我的确是个混蛋。更重要的是,关于我的情况,你们提出的想法我肯定都已经想到过了。多年以来,我一直在思考着自己的处境。而我内心得出的结论永远是相同的:我将继续在错误的时间里出现在错误的场合,然后我将陷入重度的抑郁,最?#31456;?#20026;土狼的食物。